The Wagstaff Weekly

I have lost my main file which contains all the day-to-day things I need. I didn’t delete it by mistake though - I opened up my laptop, clicked on the file icon and it wasn’t there. The only thing I can imagine is I skipped a message as I rushed to close the computer the night before, but surely it wasn’t asking me to delete my most active file was it?

Note to self: TAKE A BACK UP!!

I was gutted but as my wife is often fond of telling me ‘things happen for a reason!’ Really?

Actually I know someone who believes that. They were stopped for speeding and say it’s the best thing that could have happened to them. They went on a speed awareness course and they now drive within the limit and arrive at their destination feeling much claimer and only a few minutes later than they would have normally.

Please stop me eating so many mince pies.

You know you are getting old when Nana Cherry’s daughter is making music and Daniel Radcliffe looks older than his 26 years. Have you seen his number one haircut?

We had TV rain the other day. That rain you see manufactured on television when you know it’s a high pressure hose and a wind machine. It just looked like that.   

It lifts my spirits to know that others have bizarre episodes just like me. Long story short – my friend got a card through his letterbox to say he’d missed a delivery, so rather than wait in for it, he drove twenty miles to the depot. When he got there the package had been put on the return van, so he drove home (remember this is now a forty mile round trip) to meet it. The van pulled up, the driver went next door, so my friend called the office. Seems the parcel wasn’t for him, the card had been put through his door by mistake!

Do you get a feeling of trepidation when you drive over a railway crossing? I do and I get a similar feeling walking under a bridge if a long freight train is going overhead or on a bridge spanning a big stretch of water.

You still see cars with tax discs in the window. Do you suppose some people are determined to be the last one to have them?

I'm usually first to say sorry. Let me qualify that.....not always in an argument I admit but if I'm wrong, and if like the other day when a guy on a bike almost ran me over on the pavement, I apologise first. I always do that even if it's not my fault.

I am losing it - I tapped my number in to the cashpoint before I even put my card in the machine!

Yes I will try the new blend of this week's coffee. Oh and thanks for telling me it's more expensive.

Ask me anything about condensation and I bet I can tell you the answer. I’ve been genning up on it ahead of buying a dehumidifier. For example, apparently it’s a waste of time opening a window from mid-October to mid-March as the air outside is more damp than in your home. Also condensation loves a cold room, so my trick of saving money and leaving the heating off is only adding to the problem.

How much are you spending on each other this Christmas? Is it really bad that my wife and I don’t buy each other anything at all, preferring to wait for the January sales and get something for the house? Who says romance is dead? Actually I have never heard anyone claim that romance is dead!

If a cyclist is pushing a bike along the pavement, are they technically a pedestrian?

We normally do Christmas dinner and my wife goes to town with decorating the table. This year it’s my sister-in-law’s turn but she isn’t going to bother with any decorations. I have a feeling there will be a change of venue because it’s become a contentious issue.

We are up to Now 92! What was your first Now album?

Have I shared the saga of my son dropping his five-week old iPhone 6 down the loo? We got lots of suggestions online and watched numerous YouTube videos on how to save it (including putting it in a container of rice for a week) but the phone has completely died. The fundamental, but understandable mistake is that he tried to switch it on and that’s a no-no as it shorts out.

Did you know there are companies that will come round to your house and do phone repairs?  

My wife’s sister has the same TV/broadband package as us but pays about half the price! I’m going to give them the ‘… come my sister-in-law’ speech and see where it gets me.

My friend rang up a company and the operator said to him ‘we are a business you know’ and you think fair comment. Have we become too used to simply expecting discount prices?

Not wishing to tempt fate here, but are we not supposed to be in the grip of extremely cold weather now? Were the headlines not saying snow from mid-November to mid-March?

It is OK to toast the bread once you’ve scraped the mould off isn’t it?

I did something the other day that I haven’t done since my teenage years…..I looked at a copy of the NME. They were giving free copies out on the street and it is no exaggeration to say the magazines were piled waist high.

Are you ever too old for an advent calendar?

I was having a quick walk at the weekend when a car went by with a young lad in the passenger seat and presumably his dad driving. Anyway the window went down and the boy tossed a load of rubbish out. What great parenting skills! You can imagine the conversation: ‘What should I do with this dad?’ ‘Just throw it out of the window son, there’s a good lad’.

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